Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Christmas in July

July has definitely went by fast for me. Since I tend to look at the world in 2 week increments due to the bi-weekly paychecks I receive, I am pretty much already at the end of September because it seems like that will be the next time I’ll have a free check. So with that being said, July was pretty much over for me before it even started. lol. This week however hasn’t went by too fast. It seems like it’s taking forever for this week to come to the best weekend ever…aka…birthday weekend…payday weekend…tax free weekend…spend all 3 days with TG weekend…and get presents and stuff weekend. lol

It’s only Wednesday? Are u serious? *impatiently tapping my foot* Ugh! Lets go..let’s go…let’s gooooooooo!!

So I was asked 3 times already by TG to go get my finger sized. My coworkers seem to think they’re hearing wedding bells in the near future. hahahaha. Now THAT’S funny. I just think he wants to know for future reference. They think I’m in denial. I denied being in denial. What? Felt like the right thing to do. *shrug*
But really… when I thought about it. He DID kinda keep on asking me to go ASAP to find out my ring size so that he can know. 3 times in the last month IS kinda a lot. Hmmm… *shrug*

Anyways… while at Zales Monday sizing my finger. I couldn’t help but glance at these beautiful rings… AND their prices. Lawd have mercy! I mean… we already trying to get our head above water…and now he just so happened to fall in love with a girl who seems to unintentionally desire the most expensive ish on earth. Poor TG. I saw a lot of rings I liked. They were all over $4,000. *blink, blink*

This solitaire /enhancer combo was one of the ones I saw that really looked nice on my finger.


So people...... I really wanna know what ya’ll think. Now, I’m not saying we’re getting married tomorrow…but this is something that’s been crossing my mind a lot lately…so I figured I’d ask. Now engagement/wedding rings are something you gotta wear pretty much for the rest of your life. So quite naturally, you wanna be happy with what u put on your finger. Now I’m not hard to please. For me, I’m just happy this man that I love dearly, loves me back enough to wanna make it official and get me a ring. The problem is… well… despite my being easy to please, He KNOWS me. He KNOWS the kind of stuff I like…and he’d wanna get me the best… knowing that the best for me is VERY expensive (okay that’s not the problem, here’s the problem)… BUT…it wouldn’t be financially smart to get me the one(s) I really like cuz we could do SOOOO many other things with that money. So….. what do u suggest we do?

Should we wait….and get it later? Hold off on everything until we get in a position to be able to do everything with ease. It might take a few years. Which means we couldn’t be together for at least 2-3 more years… but at least when we get the ring…we’ll be happy knowing that we didn’t have to risk not paying something else because of it.

Should we go ahead and get it now? It’s a big investment, but it’s so worth it. I mean that’s what I’m gonna be wearing for the rest of my life…might as well make it what I want. And the bills are gonna be there regardless….if it’s not one thing, it’ll be another.

Should we go ahead now and get another pretty but less expensive ring? I mean, time is of the essence. We both would like to be together way before 2007-2008. So should we just get a nice affordable ring now…and upgrade later when we can afford to?

What would you all suggest?

Thursday, July 21, 2005

My Big Day

So my birthday is coming up next Saturday and I’m a little nervous. Unfortunatly for me, birthdays are for some reason NOT my best day. I’ve went out of my way since I turned 18 to make my b-day EXTRA special…but somehow… it always becomes sub par… and for the last 3 years it’s been just downright HORRIBLE.

Wednesday July 30, 2002 – It started off pretty well. I was finally getting over my big break up from my fiance. I didn’t have a job, but I just met some new friends. I had no car…but I was gonna get a ride to the club with my cousin. I had no money…but who needed money when you had a pretty face, a good weave, big toppers, thick thighs, and an outfit that would make a straight girl turn her head. This year had the making of a great birthday. In fact, the actual day was fine until i went to the club. (yes...i was a club head back then)
My cousin and I was dropping it like it was hott and I guess I had an admirer. It was nothing new. I’ve told ya’ll about my club experiences (here). I always get the loonies. Anyway…he was nice. He watched me as he leaned on the bar. When I got enough nerves, I walked up to him and asked him if he liked what he saw. I was on a mission. It was the first birthday in my adult life that I was single and I was determined to live it up. I needed my ego fix. I was uncontrollable. I was on fire!!
I spit a little game to him…got him to buy my cousin about 3 rounds of drinks…and then in true Sway fashion, flashed him a sexy smile while staring in his eyes…and winking before walking away forever. I was through with him. I was tipsy…my cousin was tipsy…in my mind he served his purpose.

Obviously he didn’t think so. I was his now. After a few songs…he found me.

Looney: what are you doing?
Me: uh…dancing.
Looney: u can’t dance with him *jerking my arm*
Me: what the he…
Looney: Listen, dance with me…or your girl… that’s it.*turning me around so he can dance with me*
Me: *staring in disbelief* You are crazy!
Guy I was dancing with (GIWDW): oh my bad patnuh…I ain’t know she was with u
Me: *slurring* I’m not. We can dance. F* him!
Looney: *mean mugging ole dude*
GIWDW: * Oh okay. *pulling me back towards him* Well what the hell he talking bout den? *pointing at and mean mugging Looney*
Looney: *jerking me back*
GIWDW: *jerking me back*

Finally one of them managed to rip my already revealing shirt, exposing my orange push up bra. *smh* I was so embarrassed…I ran to the bathroom and stayed in there for 10 minutes trying to call my cousin who was somewhere in the club. Of course she didn’t hear her phone ring. So left her a message telling her I’d be out by the car, then I ran out of the bathroom, jetted out the club and waited my wanna- be- pimp, orange-bra-wearing, feet- just-hurting, self by her car for about 20 minutes.

Happy birthday to me. *blink, blink*


Thursday July 30, 2003- It started off great. I was happy. I took the day off from work and I had plans to get all dolled up, go shopping & buy me something purrdy for my b-day dinner party with my parents later that day, and then I was going over my boyfriend TD’s house (‘member him? click here or here) to spend the night with him. We worked together, so it was easy to just take one car to work that next Friday morning and then continue my b-day celebration on into Friday night and even Saturday if needed. Before I got out the door to do my shopping, I got a surprise phone call from an EX that I hadn’t seen in a while. He asked to come by…and hey…since it was my b-day…I said sure. (big mistake)
Things got heated between us and some thangs happened that I am NOT PROUD OF. I felt soooo bad because we both had significant others and we both knew about each others sig. O’s. I felt HORRIBLE. I pretty much ruined my own birthday. After my experience with him, I didn’t even wanna go shopping. (But I did) I picked up a flirty little dress..and got ready... hoping that my evening activities would help me forget about the afternoon shindig I had with ole EX.

I was wrong.

As usual.


My parents came home to a fully dressed and ready to go 23 year old. I was rushing them. I was ready to get my day going. I NEEDED to feel better. Unfortunately, they took my haste as my anticipation to get the dinner over with and go on to my next plans. So they decided that it would be best if I just go on with my next set of plans and they would take me out this weekend. That really kinda made me mad, but I said okay, since they seemed to have made up their minds. After all..they just did what they thought I wanted them to do. I figured it would give me and TD more time to play… so I called him. He didn’t answer. I decided to wait a few minutes on him to return my call, while my parents went to eat with out me. 30 minutes later, I’m PISSED. I’m at home, ALONE. In my pretty dress…feeling EVEN GUILTIER about my afternoon. I’m HUNGRY. My parents are out eating on MY friggin birthday and my boyfriend won’t answer his phone!!! I was heated…but more hungry than heated, so i headed to waffle house. It was close…cheap…and the only place that I could sit down and eat with out having to see couples and feel eyes watching me eating alone. He finally calls while I’m in mid meal. He apologizes… he claims he didn’t hear the phone cuz he "fell asleep waiting on my call”. (yeah...sure) So I finish my meal and go over to his house. I’ll admit. I had an AT-TI-TUDE when I got there. A MAJOR 'TUDE. My b-day was almost over and NOTHING went as planned. Guilt made me not even want to be close to him…and my attitude made him not wanna be close to me. We ended up not having that nice romantic night I’d dreamed of for days. Instead, we went to bed mad. Well I was mad… he put on his “I don’t care” face all night and was snoring before I got out of the bathroom and into bed. I couldn’t sleep. I felt HORRIBLE. I had thoroughly screwed up my day…and I needed someone to blame it on. lol. So what did I do?

3:30 AM
Me: *shaking TD* Get up. We need to talk.
Him: No sway…I’m sleep. I suggest you wait til morning
Me: *mad cuz I’m a brat and I couldn’t have my way* No…get up. I have something I wanna say.
Him: *pulling covers over his head* Hell naw. I asked u what was wrong when u got here. u didn’t wanna talk then. It’s yo fault. Now take yo ass to bed.
Me: *screaming* Noooooooooooo. *yanking covers off of him* I gotta tell you what happened today. I need to get this off my chest.

So for the next 30 minutes… I act like a COMPLETE IDIOT by basically arguing with myself cuz he went back to sleep…or pretended to all while I cried and pitched a hissy fit.

Needless to say… we broke up that next morning.

But in true Sway fashion… I got him back. *wink* lol


Anyways…Happy birthday to me. *blink,blink*

July 30, 2004- Well it started off great as usual. I was happy. I had a full time job. I had a nice lil whip (read: car). My pockets were looking good… ESPECIALLY since my birthday fell on a Friday and ya girl got PAID on her big day. I took off the entire week because I like to do it BIG for my birthday. The last two b-days were sucky…and so I was determined to make this one big. I was dating someone. Ya’ll remember Mr. Anthony. Mr. ETHEREAL himself. We was still kickin it… even after I vowed to never let him in my life again. (mistake)… He was on his best behavior and all was well in the U.S. of Sway.
A week before my b-day vacation, I made preparations for Anthony and I to go to Myrtle Beach. I was excited. A week at the beach with my baby! Just us…doing what we do. Oh…I was excited. Unfortunately that didn’t happen. *smh* He told me that his mom called him from Arkansas (that’s where he was from) and told him that his grandfather had a few brain tumors..and that he needed to come home ASAP since they had no idea how long Grandpa would be around. Well…. Of course after hearing this, I didn’t wanna go to myrtle beach. I cancelled our plans…and told him to hightail his butt to Arkansas. He left Friday before my b-day and got back Monday. Well…I had still taken off from work…and he was back by Tuesday…so he suggested that we just make the best of it and spend the week together here in the ATL. I agreed. After all, I had nothing else to do really. Thursday came and the week had been great so far. He asked me to spend the night with him Thursday night so that he could be the first to see me and wish me happy b-day in the morning. (awwww…how sweet..huh? smacking my teeth and mumbling "liar") I had HAVE a STRICT rule about spending the night over people’s houses. It’s just not something I do unless we’re a couple and have been together for a second. Spending the night is... very intimate. It’s very…suggestive. It’s very… couplish…loveish… etc. Soooooo….if I do it…I have to REALLY be feeling you. So when he asked me… I’m sure you know what I said….

YES. *smh* It was the first time since my last birthday. And what better way to usher in my special day than to “consummate” my special relationship with this special person?
So it’s Thursday night, my birthday is less than an hour away. My overnight bag was in the corner of his bedroom and we were getting ready to go party like nobody’s business. I had already informed him that Friday night (my b-day night) my friends had already planned something special for me and I was spending the night at a hotel with them. So today was really OUR celebration of my b-day. In the midst of our laughter… we heard a knock on his front door. Huh? I looked at the clock. Who could that be? We looked at each other. Judging from his facial expression, he didn’t look like he had a clue either. He heads down the stairs and I follow in silence. My stomach started doing flips…I wasn’t sure why. I found out moments later.

Turns out that his girlfriend TAYLOR came to visit him from Tennessee a day early. YES this neegro planned to screw his other girlfriend on MY friggin birthday. YES I SAID TAYLOR. YES the one I wrote about last year. Yes the one that told me she was gonna leave him alone. The one I said would probably be dumb enough to stay with him while I move on… (ha. Guess we were both pretty dumb) Yeah…well turns out… neither of us moved on. We were both STILL dating him. She showed up at the door on some “surprise boo!” tip. His behind sure was surprised. He couldn’t get outta this like he did last time. Telling me one thing and her another. Having us both believe that the other one was just a friend. Turning our words around to make a believable lie. This time, she was there… and so was i. And neither of us was going anywhere. In true pimp fashion… ANTHONY lit a doggone black and mild and let Taylor and I talk while he chilled like this was some normal ish happening and he just didn't get caught…

Me and Taylor both on some... "I thought u said you was gonna leave him alone? Um.. I thought YOU said YOU was gonna leave him alone…" bull! lol

He pretty much denied that he was messing with either of us in both our faces. lol. It pissed me off so bad I hit him. Then I got my ish told her she can have his broke down *bleepity bleep* and proceeded to drive home… ON MY BIRTHDAY. I guess he explained to her that he wasn't my man, and she believed him cuz they ended up going out and partying. I know cuz she called me to wish me a happy birthday later on that day. Wasn't that nice? (smacking teeth)


Happy birthday to me.


I wonder what this year will hold?

Monday, July 18, 2005

Been around the world and back...

What a weekend! *whew*

I mean, from sleepovers, to jail, to church, to shopping sprees, to junkyards, to candle lit bedrooms...this weekend was CRAZY! I can't even begin to tell you about it. I'm still trying to grasp it all as i sit here this crazy monday afternoon. I look like crap too. lol. Nothing this weekend went the way it was supposed to... and i'm really glad. It all started with an emergency phone call on thursday evening. That phone call had a sista shook. I was glad to hear this voice...but VERY concerned about what this voice was saying to me. It had the beginnings of being the weekend from HELL...but it all kinda turned around and easily became the best weekend i've had all year!

Anywho.... that's all i can say about it. Well...that's all i WANNA say about it. It's too much to discuss. I'll be around later. Gone.

Monday, July 11, 2005

Are ya'll hiring?

I’m still confused at how today is Monday when yesterday HAD to be Friday. I KNOW we didn’t have a weekend? C’mon. For real…. *yawn* It can’t be Monday. And then a dark stormy Monday at that. Man wouldn’t this be a great sleep-in day? *kickin rocks* I should’ve stayed home. Apparently I didn’t get the memo cuz about 70% of my department called my GOTTA-MAKE-IT-TO-WORK-THROUGH-TREE-BRANCHES-ACCIDENTS-AND-POWER-OUTAGES behind and told me that they were gonna take a personal day. *smacking my teeth* I just HAD to come to work huh? *yawn* I guess it’s okay. No ones really here…so I don’t have to pretend like I’m working really hard today. And so it’s kinda LIKE a personal day. Besides… my power’s off at home anyways… I hate taking a whole personal day and then waking up around 11 and having NOTHING to do and being mad cuz I should’ve saved that day and went to work. So it’s all good. Being in a dark, hot house with nothing to do and nowhere to go isn’t really all that fun once you’ve ate and slept. So I guess it’s okay that I’m at work. I can surf the net for some furniture and stuff.

Didn’t I tell ya’ll I was moving? What? Stop rolling your eyes, I AM. I know I’ve been saying that for 2 years but still… I’m moving. lol

Naw…this time I really am for real. I’ve already told my mom. I knew that would be the hardest part. Telling her I’m moving and not feeling guilty after she gives me that sad, hurt look is definitely a good sign that the worst part is over. *sigh* Now… next mission is to get a part-time evening job and take a tour of the townhomes I’ve been reading up on and looking at online. *sigh* I’m actually kinda dreading this part more than the telling my mom part. I’ve been filling out applications…but honestly… I haven’t really been getting too many responses. :( My friend said it was cuz my resume makes me look over qualified.
*blink, blink*

Boooooooooooooooo!

As many jobs as I’ve had, I’ve never really had a retail gig. None of the stuff on my resume is relevant to working at a place like home depot…or Rich’s. lol I’ve never had a job like that. My first lil high school job was at a dentist office. *sigh* It’s crazy to have to un-decorate your resume. lol Man, bump all that overqualified garb. Just ask me if I’m content saying paper or plastic…and if I am…gimme the job. Retail turnaround rates are ridiculous anyways…so gimme a chance and lemme make a few dollars…if I quit, you got a bazillion folks waiting to be then next ex-macy’s employee! Geez!


Oh well… *sigh* I guess it’ll all work out. *yawn*

But err uh... if any of ya'll happen to be hiring for an evening gig...holla atcha girl! lol



I’m hungry. *off to find some food*

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Karma is a *Bleep*

U ever loved someone soooo much that the thought of losing them drove you completely insane? I know I have… Actually on a few occasions. There have been many occasions where I was completely gaga over a guy and his behind really wasn’t ‘stuttin me. I mean, we was dating…but he just treated me like I was nothing… Or i just THOUGHT we were dating and then i came to find out...he just thought of us as friends. Ugh... that was the WORST! And then he’d move on to someone else and I’ll find out that he treats her like a queen. Oooh that used to make my blood boil. It also gave my ego a pretty big blow. But you know what? Not ONCE did I ever seriously consider doing him or his property any harm. I just always figured that what goes around comes around.

Well after TG finished sharing what happened to him this week, I realized how happy I was that I never did anything ugly to anyone.

Last week sometime
TG’s cell rings


TG: hello
Girl: hey, what’s up this is “Girl”… how are you?
TG: hey what’s up, how u doing. I’m good, I’m good. It’s been a while girl, what u up to.
Girl: Nothing. *giggle* (insert conversation about whatever)
TG: U still in florida?
Girl: yeah…but I’m thinking about moving to Atlanta.
TG: Oh yeah? That’s cool. It's cool up here. U gone stay with yo cousin?
Girl: Uh-Uh. I was thinking we could move in together. I’ve been missing you. It’s been so long since I’ve seen my baby.
TG: uh… YOU'RE baby? *laughing* Girl you are a trip. *thinking she was playing...*
Girl: why am i a trip?
TG: *realizing she was for real* Well, you know I got a girl now right?
Girl: huh?
TG: yeah, ‘member I told you about her?
Girl: yeah, but I didn’t know ya’ll were still kickin it. Ya'll serious?! *smacking teeth* I thought we were together?
TG: UH-UH! We good friends, but for real, I’m with somebody now.
Girl: hmph. Well…you can still see me. I’m coming up for the 4th. Lemme come through and holla at cha. We can get together for the weekend.
TG: Girl, didn’t I just tell you I got a girlfriend? All my free time ‘s gonna be spent with her. Besides, we’ll be out town anyway. U welcomed to come see ya cousin…but um, I doubt you’ll see me this weekend.
Girl: *mad* We’ll see.

TG didn’t mention too much about this convo to me. He just told me the basics the first time around. A girl from his past was trying to hook back up…he told them about me…they got mad… then end. Uh…I was used to that just as he was used to me saying the same thing. Both of us have our share of past people trying to resurface since we've been together. We're both real open and honest about all of them. I think he got me beat though. I got rid of most of my male friends during my detox program. But TG...man, women seem to just flock to him. He’s got a cool style… and i've seen with my own eyes how women just seem to flirt with him and are drawn to him, so this whole exhange didn’t phase me one bit. I said oh…like I usually do…and we proceeded to enjoy each other’s company as usual.

We were together all day Sunday. He came to church with me, he treated me to dinner, and then went back to his place. It was a relaxing day. Nothing out of the ordinary…until he mumbled that this stupid girl kept calling him all day. I was wondering why he kept looking at his phone, shaking his head and sending it to voicemail throughout service. Anywho… she stopped after a while…and we all thought everything was back to normal.

We got back from Myrtle Beach Monday night/Tuesday morning around 2am. He was in the bed by 2:30am. Everything seemed peachy keen. Our weekend was great…and we were back in tha "A" safe and sound. He leaves for work around 6 every morning. So he got dressed…still sleepy I’m sure…and proceeded to go outside and go to work. He said his car looked a little strange when he first walked out the house… like it was glistening or something. It was still fairly dark at 6, so he figured it was the streetlight or something. The closer he got to his car, the more he was able to see…until he just stopped dead in his tracks.

How about… this man’s car was egged and floured. I’m not talking about a few eggs either… I mean, any where from a dozen to two doezen eggs. ALL OVER…and his entire car was doused in FLOUR. Do you know that if that ish would have dried and baked in the sun… he would have had to get a whole new paint job? And then to top it all off… 2 of his brand spankin new tires were slashed and flattened. TG was HOT! At first, he was like… what in the hell….who in the hell… Why in the HELL…

He called the police…and after that he realized that he had a message on his phone.

Tuesday
6:30 am.

VoiceMail (VM): …to listen to your messages, press 1
TG: *pressing 1*
VM: …uh…hi TG, this is “Girl’s mom”… *sniff, sniff* I hate to have to call you with this, but my daughter was in an accident and the police said that she got in an accident on your street. I don’t know what is going on, but I thought that you should know. She told me she was going to see you, but I advised her against it since the word down in columbus is that you're practically married...but you know "Girl", she wouldn't listen. She and her friend are at the hospital and they are both okay, but my "Girl" is bleeding internally and she's having severe chest pains...and her friend had to get stitches in her face. If you need to get in touch with me, I can be reached at XXX-XXXX. *click*


So come to find out after talking to the police, her mom, her dad, his roommate, his neighbor, and her…this is what happened.

Ole girl got into town Saturday morning. She knew she was leaving late Monday night, so she hurried and called TG to see if she could change his mind about seeing her. He didn’t answer. She knew where he lived because it was the same house he’d lived in the first time he moved to Atlanta 7 years ago. So, she decided to just ride by his house. Saw his car there… called again. No answer. Knocked on the door….no answer. *she didn’t know that he wasn’t there cuz we were together* She left MAD. Sunday morning, called again. No answer. Rode by the house AGAIN. *this time TG’s roommate saw her and the friend riding by the house …he knew who she was and thought it was odd, but shrugged it off* ALL day Sunday she’s blowing his phone up cuz she wanted to see him. He ain’t at home…so she figured he was with me. She got REALLY mad. We left for S.C. Sunday night. We left my car AND his at his house cuz we went with his family. We still have no idea if she rode by there Sunday night or not. But Monday night when we got back, all was well. I left. He went to sleep.
3am in the morning, his nosey neighbor *sometimes it pays to have one of those* was still up and saw this grey Galant riding up and down the street. She watched a few times before going in the house. By 3:15, the girl got out the car…egged his car…floured it…slashed his tires…and jumped back in the car her friend was driving. They sped off…and before they could even get off of his street, they collided with a truck and it totaled their rental car. So not only did they get hurt but... they totaled an uninsured rental car, GOT caught, and once they got out of the hospital, the police took her to jail. If TG would have pressed charges…she would have been facing 3 different charges…all of which are felonies.

All cuz some guy didn’t wanna holla at her no mo'. And the sad part for her is that after all of this…. He is STILL with me… and she STILL doesn’t have a chance. So….tell me…
Was it really worth it?

*smh*

God does NOT like ugly.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

If you think this post is about you...

you're probably right.

if you still read my blog... you'll know i'm talking about you...



I was sitting here bored at work…and decided to do my normal blog hopping. I ran across a page of a person I once was very close to. He and I were MUCH closer than friends… I know this because of some of the “friendly” things that transpired between us, yet he and I never was “official”…and the only reason I knew this is because he never EVER mentioned me in his blog…although everyone else he mildly dated was there. This kinda hurt me for a while because here I was, chillin with him every week. Talking to him on the phone every other day…we’re kissing, we’re cuddling… I’m laying on his bed…and nothing. Not even a mention.
Okay…I’m getting off track…

I said all of that to say, we were pretty much kicking it hard in real life…and I wondered where it was going. I began developing feelings… I guess he didn’t. The crazy part about it is that when ever I considered moving on, and expressed that in my blog…he would call or IM me and he’d be kinda pissed cuz, “he’s interested in me” and he wanted to make our “friendship” work. But his words never matched his actions. On paper, this guy was great. He seemed to know what he wanted. He seemed to be a nice thoughtful guy. He seemed to be interested and into me. He seemed to enjoy my company. He seemed to sincerely want a nice friendship/relationship… yet… his actions didn’t back that up. AT.ALL.

He’s the kind of guy that would say, I really like you, but he’d never call. He’s the kind of guy that would ask you out, and go out with you, but not really pay you that much attention. He’s the kind of guy that would kiss you goodnight, but not call you for a week after that.
I finally got tired of it. I KNEW that I should be treated better than that…so I made up my mind to really move on. About January this year, we had a conversation after a post I wrote because he was upset that I put him on “blast”. I apologized. It was wrong of me. I didn’t think anyone knew who I was talking about…but hey…he felt violated…so in that respect I was wrong. He said we could be friends… we were gonna start over as friends. The old was squashed. I said good. But deep inside I knew that if I never called him again, he’d make no effort to call me. I knew this because this same type of convo had taken place over and over again. He’d say, were friends…then I didn’t hear from him until he was pretty sure I’d moved on. I knew he wouldn’t be a true friend. It’s sad. I knew that January day would be the last time he phoned my dial.

I was right.

He never calls… even now.

He’s definitely not the person I once thought he was. When I call someone a friend, I mean it. I’ve called him a few times since then because when I call you a friend, I sincerely mean that. We need to talk…we need to hang… we’re friends right? But when I call, …he’s sooooo busy. He says he appreciates my call but he’ll have to call me back. *eye roll*

I’m still waiting for that call.

He never calls back. That irks me. He acts like I’m pestering him. I’m bothering him. I wanna get with him. *pshhh* Puh-lease child. I’m just trying to be a friend. But I’m at the point where if he doesn’t wanna be my friend, then forget him. I don’t NEED his friendship. I just thought it would be nice to be friends. I mean after all….you SAID that’s what you wanted. I hate when people say one thing and mean another. If you didn’t wanna talk to me ever again…then be an adult, free yourself…say that ish! I PROMISE I would have deleted your # before you could have finished your sentence. But the whole…"yeah sway, I enjoy your company, I WANT to be your friend”…thing sounded so sincere. People just lie for no reason….


Anywho…. I stumbled upon his blog today because I like to see what is going on with him from time to time…and something he said in one of his posts just irritated the STUFFIN outta me.

I’ve tried to refrain from talking about him because everytime I do, I get upset. I hate to see people who deceive others by saying stuff like… no one likes me, I have no friends…yada yada…making folks feel sorry for them, when THEY are the ones not liking people…and being hard to befriend. I’ve been nothing but nice to him. I call him to see how he is because I sincerely care about him, give him encouraging words… and before TG and I were dating, I really did want to keep the lines of communication between this blog guy and I open. Not for dating purposes, but because I was trying to be a friend. So when I started reading through his posts and stumbled on these words…my blood started boiling. I wasn’t gonna write about it…but I couldn’t let it pass.

He claims that there are no good women around. I almost flipped! I almost fell outta my seat. What? Are you for real? No good women? Neeegro what am i?

Dear YOU:
When you needed to vent.. I was there.
When you needed encouragement… I was there
When you were acting shady….I was still there.
When you were kissing and holding me on Friday and writing in your blog about everybody BUT me on Saturday… I was still there.
When you said you wanted a friend… I was there.
When you wanted someone to accompany you on your b-day… I was there.
When you pretty much stopped talking to me for NO REASON… I was still FRIGGIN there.

How about this… if you want a good woman… be a good man. Try that on for size. Why would God give you a good woman to be with, when you don’t know how to treat the good ones that you’re just supposed to be friends with. Ugh! It’s not that there are no good women. It’s just that the RIGHT one for you haven’t come along yet. And yes, I know how lonely and bad that feels… but don’t be so quick to say that there aren’t any good woman just because YOU aren’t interested in the good ones you know. That’s so unattractive. Especially when I know how good of a woman I am…and you GOTTA know it too. Even if I’m not the one… you can’t deny that I’m still a good woman. And I’m sure some of the other women you’ve dealt with that didn’t make the blog were good women too. It seems the blogworthy ones you’re attracted to are the ones that dog you out! Which is sad, but it paints a picture to your readers that you just have the worst luck in women… which is not true. You know good women… you just weren’t into them. It irks me to know that some women out there reading your blog is really feeling sorry for you ..and wanting to be that “good woman” to you…as I did so many many months ago… only to find out that… you’re not always as nice and friendly, and sincere as you seem on your blog.


*whew* I feel much better... now back to Perfect Chaos as we know it.

Intentional

Look at me being all intentional and stuff! lol I WILLED myself to remember and write in this blog before the year was out.  So proud that t...