just floating around in my head and resurfacing at the most odd and random moments. Half of them I can hardly believe even happened. Yet they’re there. The visual imprints in my mind…forever burned and etched in my skull. I figured I’d share a few.
Memory most like a movie: Have anyone seen Tommy Boy? Well there’s a scene in there where David Spade and Chris Farley are riding in the car singing…without a care in the world and all of a sudden their hood flies up and they both scream because they CAN’T see the road.
Well… yeah…um…err…that happened to me and one of my boyfriends. I think it was either ’99 or ’00. We were leaving my college in conyers and we were heading down I-20 to Riverdale since that’s where he/we lived. We were doing our usual thing, he was driving his black beretta in the fast lane at about 80-85 mph and we were singing/rapping as we ALWAYS did in the car. Not a care in the world. Out of nowhere the world becomes black…and we hear the loudest thump I’ve ever heard in a car. The hood blew up so fast that it actually took me a second to realize what really happened. Surpisingly neither of us screamed or panicked. I started looking out the side window and mirror to see if he could get over. Thank GOD no cars were coming. He was scooting down in his seat trying to see through the small crack between the hood and the dashboard. We made it safely to the emergency lane…and we both got out to see the hood WRAPPED around the top of the car. It popped his rearview mirror off, and shattered/blowed his inside lights. After accessing the damage, being REALLY embarrassed, and laughing to keep from crying since this was OUR ONLY means of transportation…and he was a commission only salesman…. He stood on top of the car, kicked the hood with all his might until he finally got the hood back down. Of course it wouldn’t latch on properly because it was severely deformed….so we took his dog’s leash and tied the hood to the bumper. lol. Oh my goodness. *smh* That was sooooo scary... and embarrassing. Good times though. After I realized we weren’t dead, his car still worked, and I thanked God for that… I thought the whole scene was pretty amusing. I hope that never happens again. Once is definitely enough.
Most romantic memory: Well, I’ve had my share of romantic dates. Of course they usually are a lot better in my head. But hey, life’s not over right? So as of date, I think my most romantic memory was from my ’04 trip to Jekyll Island. Now this is weird to say because they guy I went with was not my boyfriend…and in all honesty, nothing was ever really “romantic” with us. When we’re together, we are the silliest two people on the planet. I don’t think we’ve ever had a serious moment since we’ve known each other. So for this to be my most romantic memory is kinda weird. I guess I gauge romance differently. Usually, when I have a romantic date, everything is all planned and it’s “supposed” to be romantic… so that kinda takes away from the entire aura...even though it is still special and romantic.
I guess what happened here was that the trip was very “impromptu”. It started off as kind of a joke…as everything does with us. We talked about it to kill time at work…but the more I actually thought about it, the more I was like…why not. *shrug* lol I needed a vacation. He didn’t seem to mind going. It was almost October and the prices were a little cheaper. Let’s do it. So I planned a weekend getaway to Jekyll. I’d never been and neither had he. I knew we’d have fun because we’re both silly and we’d find something to do…even if it’s just playing in the water…or looking for seashells. We didn't have an agenda. We were just gonna go.
Anywho… we get down there… and our room has a Jacuzzi in it with mirrors all around it. It was nice. Of course I was like… we GOTTA use that sometime on this trip. I don’t think there were candles…or rose petals…or even music playing…but something about us being in the Jacuzzi together was one of the most romantic memories I have. I guess it was one of the few moments in our friendship where neither one of us had a joke…neither one of us wanted to joke… everything was all of a sudden…steamy…and passionate…and… “couply”. I never really looked at him that way before then. It was kinda unexpected. I guess surprises like that are romantic to me. No one tried to make it that way…it just was.
Most embarrassing memory: Man, as clumsy as I am, I’m not really sure which memory is most embarrassing. lol. There was this one time in 8th grade where I feel off the stage at a band concert with my clarinet. *smh* Then there was another time when my mom jacked up both my boyfriends at the concession stand in the 3rd quarter of our highschool football game and EVERYBODY saw it and heard what she said. *smh* Then there was the time that I thought I was cute and saw this man looking at me while I was coming out of the store and I sashayed my cute behind to the wrong car and got in, only to see that the person driving was NOT my cousin. Then had to get out, while they laughed and get in the right car…all while the sexy man looked at me . *smh* I hate being blind. But I think what takes the cake is the scene I’ve shared a few times already on this blog. The tube top incident.
It’s my first year of college, I’m meeting new people…getting my freedom on. And 4 of my girls decide that they wanted to go to West Georgia to get their party on… so all 5 of us hop in my girl's car and jam down to some club close to W. Ga. Now mind you, I JUST turned 18, and besides the lil kiddie/ after high school graduation clubs, I had never been to a real club before. I was very wet behind the ears. But you wouldn’t know it to look at me. I was fine as all get out back then. Had on a lil black tube top, black and silver pants, black strap up stilettos and I was working it. We get there and no one’s dancing. I didn’t blame them, the music was horrible. About 30 minutes later, the crowd gets a little thicker and folks started requesting some booty shake music. So we get on the dance floor, make our infamous “girl circle” and dance with each other. After a while, the wallflowers decide they wanna pick us off one by one and dance with us. An okay looking guy pulls me out the group and asks me my name while holding my hips and dancing with me. He was tall. The top of my head didn’t even feel like it reached the middle of his chest. He didn’t seem to mind though. After a few dances, he asked me if I wanted something to drink. (drink?…I’ve never had alcohol before). I played it off and told him to surpise me with a lil somethin somethin. He smiled and disappeared through the crowd. I watched him pick me out something at the bar. My very first drink… I thought to myself. He walked back with a small shot glass of something clear. I’m so stupid, I figured if it’s clear, it’s probably not that harmless. I mean water is clear. Duh! *blink, blink* Man, I had a lot to learn.
So I take this clear contraption to the head.
May I just say, I have NEVER felt a fire in my chest quite like that shot of Tanqueray. My insides were burning! B.U.R.N.I.N.G.
Whew. It was rough going down. I mean it tastes like pepper. Ugh!
But about 10 minutes after that shot…the world was looking kinda nice. He asked me if I wanted another….and my retarded behind said yes. I’m dancing, I’m sippin on my second shot… and all is right with the world. I’m so sexy. Sooooo so sexy. Get it Sway. Shake that thang. Drop on that neeegro. Brang those hips up. Show ‘em what u got girl.
I was on cloud 9. lol *I’m so stupid*
So I’m dancing with ole dude… he’s turned me around letting my butt massage his thighs and his hands on my waist and we’re dancing… err… I’m dancing… I have NO idea what he was doing.
I had a fan in the corner. This cat had been looking at me for the last 5 minutes and I made SURE to put on a show. He know I’m sexy. You can look papi… you know I’m fine. You like how I dip? My hips mesmerizing you ain’t they? lol
He finally gets up. Awww man, I think to myself. I knew my sexiness would make him come over. He gets right in front of me… so close I can smell his beer and winterfresh breath. He leans over toward my ear, but I jerk away. “Don’t you see I’m dancing with someone?” I snap. I hate when men try to step to me when I’m with someone. He don’t know if that’s my man or not. Don’t be disrespectful. UGH!
Old dude pulls back from me and look me up and down and says… “ain’t nobody trying to holla at you. I was just finna tell you yo’ tube top is down.”
*Womp Womp*
Don’t I feel stupid. I look down and there go my boys….hanging loose. Dancing right along with me. I had to be GONE not to notice that. I don’t have no little boys either. Them thangs are heavy. How did I not know??? Immediately my face gets hot and I pull up my top… run to find my friends and head outside to tell them what happened. They laughed their behinds off at me. The whole year my nickname was “flash”. That was the last time I wore a tube top…or drank tanqueray. The sad thing is that I have NO idea how many folks saw my top down. And I know that fool with whom I was dancing is somewhere telling this story to his boys cuz his behind SHOLE didn’t tell me my top was down. *smh*
Well i guess that's enough reminiscing for today. Happy Hump Day everyone!
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