aight.... the story is much deeper and longer than this.... i mean, it went on for about 6 months...but for my fingers sake...here's the shorter, and less traumatic version.
Upon getting to his house… he asked me to sit tigh cuz he was gonna run in and get something. I agreed. About 4 minutes later, he came out with 2 elderly women.
Stalker: Sway, this is my aunt and my mom. The other two women in my life. Mom, Auntie, this is the one I was telling you about. She’s awesome.
Me: *thinking…OTHER two?…the ONE I was TELLING you about?* Oh… well it’s nice to meet you all… *feeling uncomfortable*
Mom and Aunt: *smiling and staring at me* She looks JUST like she should already be apart of the family.
Me: * thinking … huh? wth?* Well…err… I’mma go. I gotta a long drive ahead of me.
Stalker: Okay Sway, I’ll call you.
Me: Um…don’t. You don’t have to really, I’ll be fine.
I couldn’t sleep that night. I knew something was wrong. My intuiton told me that something was not quite right. So I purposed in my heart to with him about this uneasiness I felt the next time he called.
When he called a few days later, I answered the phone with the intent of getting to the bottom of all this googly eye contact, and sly comments he’d make about our non-existent relationship. However, when I said hello…I heard sobs. Was this man crying?
"I had to rush mom to the hospital" he said between snobs.
She was having a seizure and a few hours later, she was in a coma. He said that he didn’t know who else to call because he never wanted anyone to see him like that. This man was a pretty well known producer in the industry and all that know him, know him to be very strong. But what I saw was a broken man. So, being true to my name (I’ll explain my name’s meaning in another post) I began to comfort him. I prayed with him, I spoke words of life and peace over him and his mother. I was there for him. I let him pour out his heart to me. That’s what I do. That’s what I’m about. I never knew that he’d take it for more than that.
I’ve been told by many people that I have a special gift for making people feel special. I don’t know how I do it…but I manage to do it. The problem is that… some people… well, they really aren’t all that special to me. And that’s where most of my problems occur.
I led him on. I spoke to him like a wife. I spoke to him like a soulmate… well at least that’s what HE claimed a month later while breaking the restraining order I had on him.
Why did I get a restraining order?
Well… the week that his mom was in the hospital, I guess I crippled him. I’d call him to see how they were doing. I soothed him by talking with him, reading the word to him, speaking into him. I built him up. (his words) I was always there. And he fell even harder for me. He started telling me that God told him that I was his wife. *smh*
He honestly thought that because I was there for him in his vulnerable state and because I understood him, that we were supposed to be together. But it wasn’t so… I was just trying to be a friend. And when his mom DID get well…and I stopped the daily calls and went on with my life. He didn’t handle that too well.
In his mind, we had bonded. In his mind, he HAD to get us back to the way we were.
It got to the point where he’d call and express his feelings for me, and though I felt bad because I DEFINITELY didn’t feel that way, I gave it to him straight and to the point. But his motto was… persistence is progressive. He’d tell me how much he loved me and needed me and he put himself out there to the MAX…only to be hung up on because I kept saying to him, I gotta go. I can't take a whining man. Especially after i've expressed to you my LACK of feelings for you.
He started call at 2 and 3 in the morning. I'd pick up, curse him out, hang up. He kept calling and calling...so I started ignoring him. I figured he’d finally get the message and go on about his business. *smh* Nope. People lemme tell ya… *leaning in and whispering* Sometimes…ignoring someone DOESN’T WORK. He called 4 more times before I put my ringer on silent. When I woke up the next morning, he’d called a total of 18 times. Each time, he left a message. Dude was talking mad crazy! He scared me. Not in the, “imma kill you” way…but in the “he might die from heartbreak if he doesn’t talk to me” way. He cut himself. He'd take sleeping pills cuz he couldn't sleep without talking to me. He didn't eat and had to be hospitalized and of COURSE he blamed me. *sigh* He was obsessed. The final draw was when I went out on a date with this guy I had been seeing for a couple of weeks and I happened to look at my phone (since I always silence my phone on dates…it’s just curteous) and this man had called me 41 times within the one hour. 41 times!!! Lemme say that again... FORTY-ONE friggin times. Do you know how incredibly crazy that is to look at your phone and see 41 missed calls KNOWING you've only been out for an hour at that time...and then look at recieved calls to be greeted by....ONE FRIGGIN NUMBER??? That ISH affected me. I was AFFECTED. I was no good for the rest of the night. I couldn’t take it. No more being nice.
I told my friends. They all agreed I should drop the project…and cease all contact with him. So I called him up and told him just that. The next day, he was at MY DESK on MY JOB. WTH? My heart jumped as I walked around the corner to see him sitting there…going through my stuff. I had mentioned that I work at Kaiser in one of our earlier convos. But for him to know which one…and what building…what floor…and what desk too...man, that took a lot of research, scheming, and neuroticism. Apparently the security guard at the front desk was under the impression that he was my fiancé. (YES YA”LL he done told ole girl that we were engaged to be married and CONVINCED her that I was the one who was trippin and crazy!!)
This man had people on my job believing that he was my true love and that our relationship was on the rocks because I was doing him soooooo wrong. I mean, I had women up there talking about… "Girl, you need to stop trippin and hold on to him. He’s a good man." WTH? Negro, this man is stalking me!
So quite naturally when I called security on him and she came up there…she was all smacking her teeth like “ Well…I know this is wrong, *talking to him* but I’m gonna have to ask you to leave”…then glaring at me with her evil eyes. Like I did something wrong!
So what happened… that doggone man went outside and waited for me. He waited for me from that morning until lunch time! When I came out of the bldg to go to lunch, he RAN to me….got on one knee and proposed. In front of everyone. See...where I worked was in the exective bldgs of Kaiser Permanente. There were four large glass bldgs that formed this plaza. In the middle of all four bldgs was the "common grounds" where everyone went from one bldg to another, or sat in the garden and ate...or just communed for whatever reason. He sat his behind there all friggin morning and thought of how to EMBARASS the mess outta me. I was sooooo embarrased. People were all looking at us...saying awwwww...like this was romantic or something. I'm trying to get him off my leg and hurry to my car. It was a mess. Ya’ll when I tell you that man worried me so much that my HAIR started falling out…I am serious. I’m giving you guys the quick version (even though it doesn’t seem quick) Soooo much more happened…but I’ll hit the highlights.
He’d show up at my place, my church, my job, and I SWEAR I see him from time to time when I’m just out and about. And everytime he showed up, he’d make a scene. One day he’s proposing, one day he’s serenading me, one day he’s cutting my name in his arm. He was CRAZY. He’d be sitting outside my door crying sometimes when I got off work. It was amazing how smart this man was… he knew all of our schedule…he watched us closely. He had too…cuz he was only there when he knew I’d be home alone. It just got CRAZY. He harassed me at my job so much that I quit. I blocked his number. I threatened to go to the police. EVERYTHING. He still couldn’t stay away. So I got the restraining order. I didn’t see him for a week after that. Then the next week… I saw him watching me from my house. I called the police. Since that day, I haven’t seen him. But you better believe…I’m always looking over my shoulder.
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