...why drinking with child is NEVER a good idea.
Tuesday 3:41 am
*home phone rings*
Me: *sleepy and very grumpy* Heeello!!
My Cousin: Brese, u sleep?
Me: *blink, blink*
Me: *blood boiling* sidenote: your teacher lied... there IS a such thing as a dumb question.
Me: *thinking in silence, it is threeee forty mutha-effin ONE in the mutha-effin morning!!!!!*
My cousin: Okay, okay... duh i know u sleep. *goofy laugh*
My cousin: But i just wanted to know... *insert drum roll* DID BIAH GO TO THE JAZZ FESTIVAL LAST YEAR? *silence...actually awaiting an answer*
Me: *head feeling like it's about to explode*
Me: *click*
Why in the WORLD do people call me at the wee hours of the morning KNOWING my do not disturb unless it's for death (not near death....death neegros death!!) notices only??? That is IT. NO OTHER EXCUSE is acceptable for calling me on a workday at 3:41 AM. And then to ask me that? THAT???!!!! Neegro that couldn't wait until morning? Are you serious? Did you really just wake me up to ask me that? *confused* I'm not on an episode of "boiling points"? and... you're NOT dying?
So lemme get this straight. It's 3:41 in the morning and YOU can't sleep cuz for some reason, you can't figure out if biah went to a doggone jazz festival...that DIDN'T EVEN HAPPEN THIS YEAR....
and you thought it would be a great idea to wake ME up to find out? Huh? Are you REALLY that retarded?
There are only 2 things in this world that makes my blood BOIL. One is annoying drivers who keep their blinkers on too long, or try to speed up in order to make you get behind them while you're trying to get over. Two is waking me up for NO REASON when i'm in my good sleep grove. DON'T DO IT! Just don't.
Momma wanna give her sweet little princess a goodnight kiss and i'm sleep. Momma will get caught with a nasty attitude of me staring her down, grunting and smacking my teeth.. followed by an abrubt turn AWAY from her while mumbling about hating being awakened. Sorry momma...you know i'll give you a million hugs and kisses when i'm up and right before i go to bed...but when i'm sleep, JUST DON"T DO IT.
Little cousin wanna wake me up before 10 on a saturday to go get breakfast at Mickie D's and get a mush in the face followed by the loudest "GET OUT" yell possibly known to man. Sorry lil man, you know i'll buy you whatever you want and make u some bomb azz pancakes when i get up... but when i'm sleep, JUST DON'T DO IT.
Boyfriend just UP for no reason thinking about his babygirl and decide to call me at 2 just to say "I love you"... *smh* he will NOT be happy about being told not to EVER EVER EVER call me again promptly followed by wonderful conversation from Mr. Tone. Sorry baby, you know i didnt mean that...and as soon as i awake and remember you called, i'll phone your dial and proceed to give you the loving words you needed...but when i'm sleep, JUST DON'T DO IT.
*sigh*
I need to start cutting off my ringer.
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