Thanks…giving… thanks…part II

I figured I’d just briefly comment on my thanksgiving holiday. It’s not much to tell since I really didn’t do much. But I think that's what made it so nice. I had on Pajamas about 80% of my weekend. Spent a lot of time alone and thinking. It was good for me.

Anywho… a sista went to church on thanksgiving morning as usual. It’s amazing how people look at me funny when I say that. As if going to church to give God praise and thanks for all He’s done for me on the very day set aside to show gratitude is just the dumbest thing they’ve ever heard. If ever there was a day to go to church, surely Thanksgiving would be it. *shrug* But I digress.

So I went to church and enjoyed the service. We got out a little earlier than usual. I think it was because this was the first time that the FALCONS played on Thanksgiving. lol. So you know when church let out…all the men were honking their horns trying to tell their chatty wives to get their tails in the car.

My parents and I went to my grandmother’s house and stayed there until about halftime. It’s sad I’m measuring my day by the game. lol

Anywho… gramma was happy to see us. I saw a lot of my family…which isn’t really a big deal like it should be since they all live about 15 minutes from me and I see them all the time. But hey, it’s thanksgiving…and for that reason, it was a big deal. So we all hugged and smiled all funny at each other like we hadn’t seen each other in ages when really, I just saw them fools yesterday. *smh*

We made it home around 1. I got outta my church clothes and put on my pj’s. I had NO plans to go or do anything else that day except eat, sleep, and watch a little tv.

I must admit, I was a little sad cuz my baby and I weren’t together. He left Wednesday night to meet up with his brother so that their band could head to florida for a Thanksgiving Gospel Concert. I would have loved to go, but his group is all males, and their hotel rooms were already taken care of…meaning if I went, I’d have to sleep by myself, and pay for my room. Uh…that’s alright bruh, I’ll wait til you get back. *sigh* I might as well get used to it. My baby is a traveling musician… and pretty soon, I will be hitting the streets with my vocals too. I guess it’ll make us appreciate our alone time together even more. I can already tell that once we really start getting serious about our talents… we’ll be very busy traveling.

I think we should invest in him a better phone though. He got metro PCS…which if you’re in the A, you KNOW ain’t worth ish! So when he’s out of Atlanta, I can’t really keep in touch with him. I don’t like that. He bought a trac phone before he left, which made me happy, but I still didn’t wanna call. I’m funny like that. So on thanksgiving, I laid in bed with my remote in one hand, and my cordless in the other. Watching tv and waiting for him to call to tell me they made it to florida safely and to wish me a happy thanksgiving. I dozed off a few times, and everytime my phone rang, I was very disappointed cuz it wasn’t him. I hate being like that. Why didn’t I just call him and get it over with?? I’m so extra!

Anywho… I felt better when he finally called. Apparently they left later than initially planned and their day was thrown off. After he called, I laid in bed and smiled. I have so much to be thankful for. Even from last year, God has blessed me so much. I had a lot I could have done this year for the holiday. But I was content lying in bed with my remote and pajamas. I didn’t NEED to party with my friends. I didn't NEED to meet anyone. I didn’t NEED to be out and about. I didn't NEED to spend money to comfort me. I was fine with my life. With being alone. With silence. Cuz I knew that it was all by choice…and that my life is full and complete now. So different from how I was feeling last year.

Here’s last year’s thanksgiving post (CLICK HERE). lol I’m thankful that my prayers were heard.

Anyways TG got back on Saturday and I was so happy that I practically flew to his house and squeezed the mess outta him. Good thing he missed me just as much or I woulda looked real… psycho. lol Sunday we ate with my parents and had the “Thanksgiving” I wanted to have Thursday. I told him that come Christmas…we gonna be TOGETHER. I don’t wanna hear about any concerts or yada yada. I don’t care where we go or what we do, but we gotta be together.

Okay I’m done rambling… hope everyone else had a good thanksgiving holiday.

thanks...giving...thanks

I wanted to complain soooooooo bad. Ooooh you just don’t understand. I’ve been yearning to COMPLAIN for almost 2 weeks now!

Ugh… I gotta let it out. So much is goinz on. Everytime TG and I take a step in the right direction, it seems like something knocks us right back. I feel like I’m majoring in minors. Like…. I’m doing so much that nothing is getting done. We can’t just focus on one thing cuz EVERTHING'S all happening at once!! We wanna get married, we wanna move, we wanna transfer the kids up here, we wanna have a wedding, we wanna get ready for Christmas, he wanna change jobs, we wanna get our CD project started, he wanna get his family’s group back together, I wanna join his church and tell my pastor what’s going on, I wanna get a new car, we wanna save money so we can furnish our new place, buy the rings we want, have money for the kids move and yada yada yada, we wanna help out another ministry TG just started playing for, we wanna help the “EX” get her stuff together so that she won’t annoy us and do the crazy retarded mean things she’s been trying to do for the last 3 months, we wanna start ministering and walking in our calling, we wanna do so doggone much and ain’t NOTHING GETTING DONE!!!

We’re just running around talking about what we need to do and doing nothing. Majoring in minors… focusing on the little things…and getting nothing accomplished.

So we find ourselves stressed. The minute it seems we can finally focus one one thing and that particular thing is looking promising…something else falls completely apart and we must divert our attention to that until the next thing fall apart. *deep sigh* I JUST WANT PEACE.

Of course you’re probably looking at the screen like… “um… sway…. That’s called life, sweetheart.”

Being grown is SHOLE not like I pictured it to be growing up.

So I wanna complain about that. I wanna complain about my situation with my mom too. She and I have butting heads lately because she detests me spending the night with TG and it’s sooooooo hard for me not to just stay over on the weekends. So yeah… I’m so ready to leave…and I think she’s actually finally ready for me to leave. (haha) I never thought that day would come…but I think it’s here. So a sista TRYING to get all her ducks in a row ...

( sidenote: why do we say that? Are ducks really that hard to get in a row? They always look pretty straight to me…and it doesn’t seem all that hard…*shrug*)

...trying to make sure everything falls into place properly…so moms and i usually just fight…then I apologize cuz I know she gonna hold her ground til I do (my mom’s side of the family is stubborn). Then we make up and be cool until the next fight…which usually happens every other week.

Then my finances are…. Ahh… nevamind…that’ll take too long.

*sigh* Let’s just say I feel like mumbling…grumbling…and complaining.

But

I

Really

CAN'T.


Yesterday
5-ish
My house

TG: Man I’m full…yo’ mamma can throw DOWN!

Me: *laughing* Yeah, my momma’s no joke. I’mma be like her when I grow up.

TG: whew, I don’t even wanna drive home. I wish we drove your car so you can drive. Note to self: I GOTTA teach you how to drive a stick.

Me: Awww baby! Well lets go ahead and go before you get too sleepy. It’s already starting to rain. Lemme tell my folks we gone. *kissing TG’s forehead and running upstairs and almost knocking my dad down…who happened to be coming down the stairs as i headed up.*

Dad: Whoa …. you almost knocked me down.

Me: My fault. I was just finna tell ya’ll we leaving.

Dad: Oh… hold on…check this out. This is crazy I’ve never seen anything like this before. *coming down to the living room where TG and I was previously watching Players Club and changing it to the discovery channel*

We stood there appalled at what we saw. Frozen to our seats…we sadly looked at this little girl. I read the bottom of the screen…where the show’s title was displayed… “Born without a face”


I have NO reason to complain. I at least have a face. She has slits on her cheek that are supposed to be her ears. Her eyes are larger than anything on her…and they are located on each side of her nose. Her nose isn’t really there. It kinda looks like Michael Jackson’s. And I don’t remember seeing a mouth. It was worse than anything I’ve ever seen. Sort of like how a baby looks in it’s first 2 months in the womb… alienesque. Nothing was developed right…nothing in it’s proper place…

She can’t hear…talk, walk….and can barely move at all…yet I think I have a reason to complain?

There’s always someone worse off… Be thankful for life. If you have health and strength…what could we POSSIBLY complain about? I’ve learned. I no longer wish to complain.

There's no place like home...

Last Friday Night/ Saturday Morning
TG’s Place

“Miss Sue-quala…. Are you gonna spend the night with us and my daddy?”

“No baby girl, I’m going to my house. I’ll be back in the morning.”

“Well, how u getting home?” She asks loudly.

“I’m gonna drive.” I say as I play with her beaded hair.

“Miss Sue-quala… it’s late. Can we take you home?”

“Haha…awww that’s sweet babygirl, but naw I’m gonna….”

“Yes babygirl, we’re taking her home” TG chimes in after zooming by with a load full of clean clothes.

“Let daddy fold these clothes and ya’ll put on ya’ll coats so we can take her home”

I look at him from the living room sofa. He’s tired and I know it. He just drove back from getting them from Columbus and it’s now 2 am Saturday morning. Arguing with this man is like arguing with a rock. No matter how many good points I have, he still ain’t hearing it. I put up a small fight by strolling into the bedroom and joining him in his folding frenzie.

“Baby, I know you’re tired. I can drive myself. I’ll call u as soon as I get home.”

“Uh-uh” He shakes his head. “It’s late, and you look just as tired as I do. Besides, I’m already up. I’ll just take you home and come get you in the morning.”

“But baby, the kids already took their baths…and babygirl's already coughing. I don’t want her out in this wea...”

“Sway! If you fall asleep at the wheel, I would never forgive myself. Stop arguing with me. I’m taking you home. End of discussion”

_________________

9 am Saturday Morning
My Place


“There she is! Yay!” lil TG exclaims while climbing from the front seat to the back with babygirl.

“Hey lil TG!” I say while giving him a hug.

“ Is this where you live?”

“Yup” I said getting into MY car that they picked me up in.

“oh… It’s faaaaaar from us!” He exclaims!

“Yeah it is”

_____________

About 4pm Saturday afternoon
Just getting back from Burlington Coat factory


“My momma said that after December comes and goes away and the next month that comes… that next time in January, I'm gonna live with my daddy and I’m never going to Columbus again!”

“Oh really?” I question lil TG casually as we walk up the driveway.

“Yup” he hyperly chirps.

“And how do you feel about that?” I say

“Good! I like staying with my daddy”

“Well that’s good.” I smile, and put my hand on his head.

_____________

4:30ish Saturday afternoon
TG’s kitchen

“Baby I’m so tired. I'm about to drop! I need to take a nap. Come take a nap with me.”

I look at him as he stirs the cheese grits for lil TG. I know he’s tired. These chilluns of his are HYPER. He drove down and back from Columbus last night…then took me home. Then was up at 7 on a Saturday…drove BACK to get me…and have been luggin us around all day. This man is superman. I was actually a little tired myself. Babygirl wore me out!

“Alright…lemme check on babygirl and lil tg.” I warmly reply.

I dry my hands and head to the living room to check on the kids. Lil TG was watching cartoons and playing with the ball he won at Stevie B’s.

“Where’s babygirl?” I ask TJ.

He seemed startled. I guess the TV was kinda loud and I didn’t make much noise upon entering the room. He shrugged. I did a quick scan of the room… she wasn’t there.

“Babygirl?” I called… looking in the restroom, washroom and going back to the kitchen.

TG had vanished from the kitchen, grits still hot. I saw his bedroom door open and the blacklight on. I peep in to ask him if he’d seen babygirl.
She was asleep on my side of the bed. Man! No cuddling action today.

“Um…why is babygirl in our bed?” I whispered.

TG sleepily shrugged. He’d changed into some sweats and a wife beater.

“I’mma give lil TG these grits, then we’ll come back and figure out the sleeping arrangements.”

“Alright” I sigh.

Babygirl is smart. She knew what she was doing. She likes me… but she still wants to be the center of her daddy’s attention. I guess daddy was spending a little to much time with me. She wanted to make sure we didn’t get “too friendly” while she was there.

“Okay, lil TG’s all set. U wanna sleep next to babygirl or you want me to?”

I’ve seen how miss thang sleeps. I quickly blurted out “YOU!”

“I knew you’d say that” TG smirked.

He climbed in bed..then motioned me to snuggle up against him. I followes his instructions. I was thankful for his queen size bed. We all slept comfortably for a few hours.


Few hours later

“Daddy! Wake up! I feel better now.”

A groaning TG rolled away from me and told babygirl to use the restroom while he make her some grits.

Sensing that we were now awake, lil TJ comes in just as babygirl was crawling over us to get off the bed.

“Ya’ll all slept in here?” He questioned

“Yup” babygirl smiled.

“Where did sue-skwaylas sleep?” He asked.

“Right there” babygirl pointed, while holding her teddy bear. “And I slept over there. Daddy slept in the middle.”

“Oh” lil TG said as he and babygirl looked at me.

I wondered what they were thinking. This is the first time they’d ever seen me sleep there. This is the first time they’d ever seen TG and I openly affectionate towards each other. We usually don’t even hug when they are around.


Sunday Evening
TG’s car on the way to back to Columbus
(I was home)

“So, how do you like Miss Sway?”

“I like her. She’s nice” lil TG says nonchalantly.

“Well good.” TG smiles. Because she’s gonna be living with us when you come to live here next year.

Silence.

“Is that okay with you?” TG concernly questions.

Lil TG nods. “Yeah.”

“So what about mommy. Is she coming too?” He wonders after a few minutes of thinking.

“No. Mommy is staying down here. But you can see her whenever you like. Is that cool?”

“yeah” lil TG says.

“Just me, you, and su-skwaylas?” He asks again.

“Well babygirl too most likely”. TG says.

“Oh” lil TG laughs. “Okay that’s cool.”


And there you have it. Beginning next year… Sway will have her family... all living under one roof. I feel so blessed.

Must be bad...

It can’t be a good thing when your boss does not talk to you…and it is evident to other co-workers that she deliberately leave you out of conversations and never tell you what’s going on with work.

I mean it’s crazy. For some reason my “boss” and I do not have any words for each other. I don’t know what happened…how it started…why it started but it seems like something just changed and there’s so much tension between us. This is the same lady who PULLED strings to get me hired. I didn’t know her, but something about me she liked so much that she went to HER boss on my behalf to hire me. Well it shole ain’t like that now. Homegirl will call my co-worker, who arrives 30-45 minutes AFTER me everyday and leave her a voicemail saying that she’s out, or is having a doctor’s appointment, rather than to just call me. She leaves and tells her where she’s going…but u think homegirl even looks my way to let me know what’s up. I’m answering her line like… “uh…I think she’s here…hold on…" *running to boss’s desk and seeing she’s gone, then running to co-workers desk to find out that boss done left for the day*
SMH!
My co-worker like… “she’din ( read:didn’t) tell you? Umph. That’s crazy.”

It’s all good though. She can invite the entire office except me out on her lil long lunch breaks… and she can pretend I’m not here ALL day long. As long as on Fridays…I get my check… I’m cool. Enjoy ya’ll cheese sammiches. I’m good.


It’s bad when the highlight of your workday is going to the Seinfeld site and reading all of the episode guide summaries of each show.

I’m serious. That’s all I did for the ENTIRE DAY… except for the few minutes my coworker and I went down to the conference room to get cookies from the “Staples” fair we had. Yeah, my office is weird. We had reps from Staples come and show us their products and yada yada yada (told ya'll i was all into the seinfeld episodes.lol). You should have seen how happy a sista was when she came back from her staff meeting to find a new stapler sitting in her chair. She was HAPPY!! I’m all frolicking around the department showing off my new stapler. I have hit an all time LOW. You know u must be bored and have NO LIFE when you are excited about winning a stapler. *smh*


It’s bad when you’re so sleepy you resort to reading /focusing hard on a milk carton just to keep awake.

Ummm, guys... I never knew that milk needed to be shaken well. I figured it was like water…you just pour and voila! Yet it says right on the carton….shake well. *smh* all these years I’ve been doing it wrong. *blink, blink*

It must be bad to be known on a first name basis at a fast food joint.

Erry time I go to chickfila, my peoples be like… “hey Sway”! lol
I guess I gotta admit, I’m addicted to Chick fila’s chicken salad sandwiches.
In fact, I’m eating one now. And that’s crazy..cuz I actually started this post about a month ago. lol. And everytime I add something to my list, I’m eating a doggone Chickfila chicken salad sammich. And of course I’m real amped about it cuz didn’t even know they had it until a few months ago. My girl ordered a tray of it for our little lazy Saturday “girls day in”. It was cut up into lil triangles. I was all frowning up at it as I put it on my fruit plate…but one bite… (really that’s all it was…a bite and a half) and I was hooked. I know I had to eat about 30 of them thangs. Every since then… it’s been no stopping me. Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. And you KNOW it’s bad when I can tell WHICH chickfila you bought my sammich from cuz they all taste different. lol I be all mad when my co-worker go to the Chickfila north of the BP on N. Druid Hills instead of the one by N. Dekalb Mall. Haha. It’s crazy.


Totally random but, I think I'm addicted to addictions.
I mean, I easily attach to things and make it my addiction until I literally make myself sick of it. I'll play a song over and over and over again for an entire month, then never wanna hear it again. EVER. I guess that's why i've never smoked. I was afraid i'd be hooked...and i really hate the smell of smoke, the darkening effect it has on your lips, and the fact that i'd actually stand out in 2 degree weather just to do it. It's.not.cute.
Anywho... here's a small list of my past/present addictions.

~ Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream
~ Grape Juicy Juice
~ Carmax
~ Teedra Moss, Dwele, and Syleena J CDs
~ Blogging
~ Vitamins. (okay i'll talk about this next time. you gonna think i'm weird)
~ Smelling new shower curtains and leather
~ Bigelow's Vanilla Caramel Tea
~ Oil of Olay

and lately i've been thinking about becoming addicted to Orange Listerine. It's still in the making though. lol

umm..

I'm still trying to figure out why it's 82 degrees in November?? TG and I went to the park saturday and almost burned alive with jeans and tennis shoes on. Everyone else was rocking flip flops...shorts and tees. You mean to tell me that thanksgiving is in a few weeks? Are you sure? Shoot, with this weather, we may just have a barbeque for Thanksgiving. lol. Fish fry or something...


So I'm really falling off on this whole blogging thing. It's almost been two years since I started. TWO YEARS! I feel like a vet. I'm kinda thinking that my time here is very limited. Although I'm addicted to it, the sheer joy of blogging has kinda left. I find myself not knowing what to talk about anymore...though there's SO MUCH to be said about my life right now. I know the end is near... so...i figured i'd at least give you guys a heads up. Anywho... I got work to do, so I'll be around later. :)